Blizzard: Diablo 3 Will Feature Pay 2 Win

Activision Blizzard announced today it's plans to introduce a controversial system into Diablo 3: pay to win.

At a barnyard press conference, representative Micah Warbler decribed the new system. "Is a boss giving you too much trouble? Enter in your credit card information and see it explode with loot. Beating the Skeleton King in under 20 seconds too difficult? Pay $5 and the achievement is yours."

Micah Warbler: "Seriously, calm the fuck down."

Warbler claims the decision was based on other franchises. "We saw how Capcom handled their DLC and wanted to improve on that," Warbler chuckled. "Why waste time on balance when you can pay us to remove some of that hardship?"